I have three jokes to share with you today…
What starts with P and ends with E, and has a thousand letters?
How do you make Lady Gaga cry?
Why is Santa so good at karate?
Santa loves a good laugh – HOHOHO!
Answers…
Post Office
Poker Face
Because he has a black belt
Those are cute little jokes simple and funny. I will have to remember to tell my nephew the post office one. Kids need a good laugh too.
I hope your nephew enjoyed the Post Office joke, karmaskeeper. I think we all need to have a good laugh at least once a day 🙂
These jokes are too cute. I especially like the Post Office one the best. Too funny Santa – ha ha – 🙂
Glad you enjoyed them Skyspirit 🙂
This made me laugh out loud! More please.
Hehehehe!
We do have some other jokes listed in the blog, Holunderminze, but I’ll add some more soon, too!
I love that last one. “Because he has a black belt”. I would never have thought to make that joke.
Cute! I put a little lunchbox note into my kid’s lunchboxes each day. I am going to use these for their December notes. They love getting jokes and trivia to share at the lunch table.
What a great idea, Susie – not just a lovely way to stay in touch but making them laugh is always a good thing 🙂
Oh! If it’s alright, I’d like to share a joke/riddle:
What must you give two bodies and one head but don’t need to give a mouth:
A snowman!
It’s probably a little dry for older kids and adults, but the younger ones like it.
Of course it’s alright to share jokes on here, sorrowscal!
And that is a joke I’ve never actually heard so I enjoyed it 🙂
Hmm, alright. Let’s try another one then! Why does Santa shout “Ho! Ho! Ho!” instead of “Ha! Ha! Ha!” ?
So the Reindeer don’t think he’s making fun of them.
or, another answer could be this:
the letter A is on the naughty list.
Again, dry humor, but the kids I babysit like them. We sat down and told each other Christmas jokes last night. I got the idea from remembering this, so thank you!
Glad you and the kids had fun sharing Christmas jokes 🙂
And I like that Santa avoids hurting the reindeer’s feelings.
The post office and Santa joke are perfect for my work. Clever enough that the kids probably won’t know them, but not too far over their heads that they won’t get them when I tell them the punch line.
That sounds like a good combination for a joke, Wendy. Hope you have fun telling lots of kids these jokes!
My kids are seriously into jokes right now and I just know that they are going to adore these. My five year old will especially love the black belt one. Thank-you for sharing these with us!
You’re welcome 🙂
I agree! My family loves jokes, too. I don’t know any but I have read them all and they are so cute and perfect for family get togethers while decorating the tree. We usually listen to music and laugh and play – I think I will incorporate some of these cute jokes with them.
My joke:
What do you call a kid who doesn’t believe in Santa?
A rebel without a Claus.
I love clean corny jokes over dirty ones. Thanks!
Ho ho ho ho, Crystal – I like that 🙂
I actually just sat here and laughed for about a full minute at the rebel without a Claus answer to the joke. It’s a good one!
a Christmas kiss…….. The Guy saies to his lady friend, Sweetheart what would it take to get a kiss under the mistletoe …Lady friend replies an anaesthetic..lol
Okay, so this is more like a joke story than a one liner.
A little girl is nervous as she waits in line to sit on Santa’s lap and tell the big man what she wants. When she gets close enough, she lets a few girls and boys cut her so she can think of how to ask for what she wants. After a while of letting people cut ahead of her, it’s finally her turn.
She gulps and sits on Santa’s lap. The man shouts “Ho! Ho! Ho!” and asks what the little girl wants. After she yanks his beard to make sure he’s real, she turns her head from side to side and whispers what she wants to Santa this:
“Santa, all I want for Christmas is the answer to a joke. Why did the Chicken really cross the road Santa?”
Santa blinks back a rosy chuckle as he adjusts himself to think of an answer. However, none come to mind. Until finally, he comes up with something that might appease her.
“Why, it’s the same reason reigndeer fly of course! Ho! Ho! Ho!”
The little girl sits through the answer and Santa doesn’t hear so much as a giggle from the girl. She looks him straight in the face, and says the following:
“To get to the other side.”
After which, the entire line of children start to giggle and become more active.
Santa sighs and admitts she played a pretty good joke on him and asked her what she really wanted for Christmas. To this, the girl replied she wanted a new joke book.
I didn’t see that coming 🙂 Thanks for the laugh Sorrowscal!
I kind of like how this has snowballed into a way for everyone to share their favorite Christmas jokes. It’s a good way to get ready for the season. I love checking it every day. Unfortunately today I can’t think of a good joke to share. Except maybe one about a peppermint, but I haven’t figured out what the punchline would be yet.
Lol, that made me laugh anyway, sorrowscal.
Okay..I think I’ve got one…but it doesn’t make sense to me.
What do you say when Santa is about to eat a bunch of sweets while reading Shakespeare?
It was peppermint to be.
Groan! That makes sense and fits in the category of Dad jokes I think, lol! But well done for thinking up your own joke, sorrowscal!
Dad jokes? Hmm, I guess. It is a kind of joke my dad would say I guess. He has no funny bone though. Maybe dry humor is hereditary?!
Here’s my joke for today:
How do you find a southern North Pole?
Read a map upside down.
Another day, another joke. I’m starting to think this might be my version of a digital Christmas count down. Anyway, here’s the one for today:
What do a Christmas Ham and a Thanksgiving Turkey have in common?
Neither want to be invited to a party.
LOL!
Are you making all these up sorrowscal? Thanks for sharing your countdown with us, though!
I’m trying to make them as I go, and thanks! I hope I can manage jokes all the way up til’ Christmas. I missed yesterday because of Thanksgiving so I have two today for you all.
What do Santa and my refrigerator have in common?
They’ve both got a bowl full of jelly.
What happens if you break your leg on Christmas?
You get visited by the ghost of Christmas Cast.
My dad also said this answer: Your leg gets gift wrapped.
Hohohohho – again, thanks for the laugh sorrowscal! The Ghost of Christmas Cast is clever!
I’ve got a few more today! I hope everyone shares in on the christmas cheer! The first one is another story one, but it’s smaller.
A girl walks into an elevator of a hotel and goes up 24 floors on Christmas Eve. She then proceeds to walk down 24 flights of stairs instead of taking the elevator back down. Why? She saw Santa clause go in the elevator and told him what she wanted. When she found out that the man she admitted her toy list too wasn’t the big guy, she was so embarrassed that she walked down to the front-lobby. Turn’s out Santa was visiting the ground floor this year.
Okay! 2nd joke! …That first one seems a little stale to me. Let’s try a good old wise-crack.
Why did the Christmas Ham cross the road?
The family on the other side of the street were vegan.
Lol, I like the ham crossing the street one, sorrowscal. I’ll tell that to my kids tonight as they love crossing the road jokes (and most of theirs aren’t really funny!)
Ah! I almost forgot today’s joke too! That would never do! I’m already forgetting every other day and I really enjoy keeping up with this! I know! Let’s make this one a funny poem-like joke?
I wear a hat and put toys in a stocking- boot.
I work one day a year but I wear a suit!
I laugh and laugh like ‘ho’ ‘Ho’ Ho’
but on Christmas I’m on the Go Go Go.
That’s right! You’re right!
I’m Santa the one and true!
A nice riddle 🙂 I am enjoying your joke count down.
I’m glad you are enjoying them! I’m just sad I seem to be forgetting to post them daily in order to keep up with my countdown. Well, here’s the next batch at least:
How many elves does it take to screw in a light bulb?
It depends on how many it takes to reach the light bulb.
Peppermint, Peppermint, meant to be. What is a Christmas thing that rhymes with this is me? To get the answer, look and see, it’s Christmas Tree!
Even if it’s not everyday, it’s fun Sorrowscal 🙂
Thanks! I’m going to have to agree! Hmm, well, let’s see what I can do today. Give me a minute, okay, I think I got one.
What do a candy cane and Santa have in common?
You only see them once a year.
Here’s the joke for today! I actually find it kind of adorable, and I hope you all do too.
What’s red and brown and fuzzy all over? Rudolph!
Rudolph is always cute, Sorrowscal! My four year old gave you a huge grin for that one, sorrowscal 🙂
Cool, we actually need more Christmas jokes because they are especially great for children. They are not rude and have no bad words!
Yes, it is nice to have completely appropriate jokes to hand!
Thanks! I’m glad she liked the Rudolph one!
Here are a few more to tide over the wait!
Even the chupacabra celebrates Christmas! How does he say it?
Fleece Navidad!
How did the Grinch steal Christmas?
He used a giant sack.
Do you see what I see?
I should hope not. Otherwise you’re me and that would be weird.
That’s all for now!
Here are today’s jokes!
What do you call it when Santa comes across a fork in the road?
Time for a quick bite to eat.
What do you call a pig that gets super powers on Christmas?
A winter wonder ham!
Why does Santa need to check his list twice?
He forgets to put on his glasses the first time.
Ho ho ho ho ho ho!
I love that he forgets to put his glasses on every year!
thanks! I’m glad you enjoyed all of my jokes this year. I must admitt I love to tell jokes that might not be entirely all that funny, but I do find them cute, and I was very happy to get to share them with everyone.
And I was happy you shared them with us 🙂
I really enjoyed these Christmas themed jokes and shared them with family during our Christmas celebrations. They were quite a hit and I just wanted to thank you for posting them.
You’re quite welcome Juno, and I’m very glad to have contributed to making your Christmas celebrations fun 🙂
I can’t wait til’ the coming holidays and next Christmas to tell more, and subsequently come up with more, wonderful jokes to tell too!
Looking forward to laughing at them, sorrowscal 🙂
If The Easter Bunny works on Easter, and Santa works on Christmas, then when is their holiday?
St. Patricks Day.
…I’m sorry if nobody else gets it. I don’t get it myself, but when I thought of the answer, I couldn’t stop laughing in my head for some reason.
What is an elf’s favorite composer?
Danny Elfman.
Lol!
Are you going to keep doing a joke a day, sorrowscal? 🙂